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Looking at the rollercoaster of family life from baby to adult and everything in between

Wednesday 26 February 2014

Guilty Pleasure

OK, it's time to own up to my guilty pleasure, a very embarrassing one for  a caring, gentle, nurturing mother. I love watching films and television series about organised crime, things like The Godfather, The Sopranos and Boardwalk Empire all of which I have watched many times over. Part of my interest in The Godfather stems from the historical aspect, I love the scenes portraying the family's arrival at Ellis Island and their early years in the US, but I am also fascinated by the way in which the characters switch so quickly from warm family men to sadistic killers. This is particularly in evidence in The Sopranos where the main character does everything he can to shield his children from his "job" and to steer them towards academic achievement and lawful futures. I am amazed at the almost Jekyll and Hyde personalities of these people, one minute acting as the loving, dutiful son but the next beating a waiter to death for serving the wrong food.

I abhor violence; I really am a gentle person who is patient and loving and kind. I have five sons who have been brought up not to resort to their fists in settling arguments and I can honestly say that I can count on one hand the number of times my children fought each other (they did have horrendous verbal arguments but that's another story). I don't like blood or dead bodies (I can't even remove a mouse from a trap) but when it comes to entertainment the more blood and gore the better. When my children were young I could only indulge my guilty pleasure once they were all safely tucked up in bed and fast asleep; I would watch with the volume turned down low not wanting even the faintest sounds of violence to penetrate the innocent ears of my children. My children gravitated towards gentle toys like cleaning sets, play kitchens, play shops, arts and crafts and spent hours immersed in an imaginative world where violence played no part. As they grew older they started to show an interest in the history of the World Wars and learned about the weaponry and battles but still were gentle and non combative.
We had many discussions about the futility of warfare and how violence did not solve problems. Little did any of them know my guilty pleasure.

But boys grow up and become men and become aware of the cruelty that exists in the world. At some point my eldest son wanted to watch The Godfather films, mainly as background to learning about 1920s America, but also because he'd heard what amazing films they were.  I was happy to oblige and dutifully sat to "supervise" his viewing. I think at some point during the films it must have become obvious that I had watched them many times before. The proverbial cat was definitely out of the bag! The bonus was that the two of us could dust off the boxed set of The Sopranos (hidden away during those years when the boys went to bed too late to allow me to watch alone) and we could start watching together from the beginning. Interestingly he too was fascinated in the psychology of the gangsters rather than watching purely from the point of view of the violence. He too is the gentlest of people, proof that watching violence doesn't make us condone it or become violent ourselves. One thing these films has taught us though is that you can't always tell what a person is like from the outside; many seemingly innocuous people are in reality monsters just as some people who appear gruff on the outside are really pussy cats.

My eldest child is away at university and my youngest still far to young to watch such things so my guilty pleasure is once more on the back burner, although I have been watching Game of Thrones, which has no shortage of bloody scenes, with two of the teenagers, so for the most part now I indulge my totally innocent pleasure of romcoms; one extreme to the other! But I am sure in time I will return to the gangster movies, perhaps I will become like my own Grandmother who loved watching films in which Charles Bronson played a vigilante. Actually, I seem to remember having to stay up to watch with her to make sure she got to bed afterwards. Perhaps that's where it all started.....

Anyone else out there who shares my guilty pleasure?


2 comments:

  1. I'm guilty too! Understand you perfectly. My guilty pleasure is watching TV period dramas. I recorded lots of them over Christmas and had a wonderful time sitting there watching them all (with cups of tea galore). But then I felt guilty about not doing all the things I should have done instead of watching TV. Fell less guilty when I watch TV while ironing or cooking & also makes all those boring jobs a bit more bearable. - Posted by: Cheryl Bentley.

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    1. With five boys I always have loads of ironing so always have a good excuse to watch something. Why do we feel so guilty though about having some down time?

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